As we begin to draw with freedom we almost inevitably fall back into dualism. The idea that what is being draw is separate from the person doing the drawing. This comes about because our interest shifts back towards the drawing itself as another object. As soon as we focus on what the drawing looks like our attention has to shift from the experience of oneness with the experience of seeing/drawing.
This is perfectly natural, if rather infuriating. We have spent our lives up to now thinking about drawings being something we make rather than do so when given the opportunity to consider the drawing again it is only natural we will slip into old habits.
The key to overcoming this dilemma is to consider the idea of authenticity. When we draw without looking at the paper we can create an authentic experience of being in the world. That is to say the experience is genuine, not tainted by the ego. Once we consider the drawing as an outcome we can easily slip into concerns about the drawing as an object separate from the experience. Here we should pause and notice both what we are concerned about and who is doing the concerning. Clearly in order to be concerned about ‘how good’ the drawing it is the ego that has taken back control.
Noticing this shift from the authentic experience of seeing/drawing to the fabricated dualism of the ego, the fraudulent but tempting, me and it, is key to being able to maintain the clear-sightedness of being in the world that drawing meditation can offer